DONN FELKER

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Being Absent While Being Present (don’t do this)

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I have a confession to make.

I’ve been absent, and well, I haven’t written here, consistently, for a long time and that’s not what I intended.

I’ve been “here”, aka present … but … I’ve been absent while being present. Not good.

That’s about to change, but first, let me ask you a question …

Have you ever looked back on your life and wondered … man, what happened to the last few years? Where did they go?

Yeah, me too.

In fact, that just happened to me, and to be honest it was rather depressing. Super depressing.

You see, I just wrapped up a three-day conference in Miami (where I was when I wrote this this) and this conference helped me realize I was not hitting my full potential.

Not even close.

Like, I’m a total loser slacker right now. It’s like someone smacked me in the face with a hammer. That kind of wake up call.

It wasn’t always like that …

I remember years when I accomplished so much – writing a best selling book, kicking off my consulting career, having another child, moving, blogging multiple times a week and writing apps for multiple clients. I’ve done all of those within a year before. The past three years though … I haven’t even come close to that capacity. I’ve been slacking.

How do I know?

I’ve been wanting to write a couple of books for a few years now.

Guess what?

They’re not written.

But … how do I know I’m slacking? Books take a long time to write, right?

I know I’m slacking because I wrote my first book, which was a best seller according to Neilsen Bookscan, in under 3 weeks. That’s no joke. I worked 16-18 hours a day. 6-8 hours of sleep each day and did nothing but work at my client and write a book. I finished it in 3 weeks.

So yeah, I know I am capable of massive action.

This last few years though …. Not so much … I haven’t done shit in comparison to what I can do.

Ok, sure … some things have happened … I’ve helped our podcast (Fragmented Podcast – An Android Developer Podcast) grow to over 2.2 million listens, I’ve re-launched Caster.IO (an online platform for teaching mobile development to all walks of life) and I’ve expanded my knowledge of leadership, sales, marketing and more.

Some might think “work that’s a lot that you’ve got done”. You kicked ass man!

I don’t think so. Not at all.

I know I can do more.

A lot more.

You see, I could have done all of that in a matter of months, not over three years … but I didn’t push myself.

How is that possible? Why didn’t bigger things happen, Donn?

It’s because I was absent while being present.

Yes, I was in the chair.
Yes, I was doing the work.
Yes, I was showing up.

But …

No … I was not giving it 150%. I was there, but I was mentally absent.

I was giving it 25% while my mind was aimlessly wandering around. Social media, books, distractions, shiny objects. Drinking a few beers “to relax”, watching Game of Thrones. You name it.

The only thing I was crushing it at was my consulting career. I can do that with my hands behind my back and to be perfectly honest with myself, I could have done that 3x better. So… let’s scrub that too, I didn’t crush that at all. I should have though.

Frankly, I’m rather disgusted that I haven’t done more. I have much to offer everyone and I’ve kept it to my self, and well, … thats just plain selfish.

Why am I telling you all of this?

Because I’m changing things.

It’s a simple concept to grasp – If you want changes to occur the #1 thing you have to do is CHANGE.

Do you want to work for yourself?
Then CHANGE what you’re doing.

Do you want to get more speaking opportunities?
Then CHANGE what you’re doing.

Do you want to be a leader in your field?
Then CHANGE what you’re doing.

Do you want to have a bigger social following?
Then CHANGE what you’re doing.

You can’t get better doing the same thing you’re doing.

You need to CHANGE and then you need to be disciplined to perform the life-changing tactics over and over again over long periods of time.

Change + Discipline + Long Periods of Time = Life altering results

That’s why I’m writing today. I’m changing. I’m going to be much more active in your inbox.

What am I going to be sharing with you?

I’m going to start sharing more information about how you can start working for yourself.

That’s right.

Be your own boss.

No more full-time job for “the man”.
No more commute (or less of one).
No more saying “Yes” when you really mean “No”.
No more saying “I wish I took that one change”.

We’ll start off with consulting and work our way into some products that you can create over some time.

Stay tuned because some more stuff will be coming your way soon.

If you’ve read this far. Hit the comments section and let me know.

Thanks for reading.

I’ll be sending these articles to my email list a week or two in advance. If you’d like to jump on that list, you can do so here.

Photo by Fortyozsteak on Unsplash

Looking for an Android Job?

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🔎 Looking for an Android Job?

I just wanted to give everyone a quick heads up – Caster.IO is now managing AndroidJobs.IO 🎉 – the #1 independent Android Job board.

With Caster.IO‘s adoption of the site, we’ve redesigned it and made it super easy for you to find and post jobs to our job board.

If you’re looking for a new position in the industry or if you’re looking to hire someone to join your team – we’re here to help. Each job posting will be sent out to our email list as well as included in our #AndroidDev Digest newsletter for 4 weeks at no additional cost.

We already have a number of great jobs posted to the site, by companies such as:

  • Instacart
  • Big Nerd Ranch
  • American Express
  • HelpScout
  • Pocket
  • Shopify
  • Uber
  • Wayfair
  • and more …

Including AndroidJobs.IO into Caster.IO’s portfolio of sites inches Caster.IO closer to my goal of it being your #1 destination for Android content, news, and education.

Check out the Jobs on AndroidJobs.IO

As always, if you have any questions or concerns, drop me a line below 👇

I Don’t Have Time is a Myth

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I Don't Have Time

“I don’t have time” is a myth.

The statement, “I don’t have time”, really gets under my skin.

Why? Because you do have the time.

Get up early. Cant? Go to bed earlier.

Stop watching TV shows and YouTube channels that do nothing to help you progress in your dreams.

Stop playing video games.

Stop going out to the bar.

Stop wasting time reading news websites, Reddit, surfing Facebook or Instagram for hours.

You have the time. Its right there in your hands. Use it.

How much time would you get back if you stopped doing all of those things above? You’d be blown away by how much time you’d get back. In fact, let us dig in a little bit deeper …

Watching 45 Days of TV Per Year 👎

The average American spends 3 hours a day watching TV.

3 HOURS A DAY!

Some reports show an upwards of five hours a day.

Let us be conservative and stick with 3 hours.

That’s 21 hours a week!

90 hours in a month!

1,095 hours in a year.!

That’s over 45 days of watching TV for 24 hours straight!

This is just watching TV. This does not include time spent looking at your phone!

That’s just insane.

“I don’t have time.”

 

Pffft. Whatever.

 

No, you do have the time – you’re just choosing not use it for the things you say “You don’t have the time for.”

The magic of time optimization

Is life hard sometimes? Yes, it is. Oh god yes. It can feel completely overwhelming and you might feel like you can’t get a breath. But … you still have time … if you don’t waste it.

Single mothers and fathers exist and they make magical things happen. They work multiple jobs, have little or no help from family and they have to do everything themselves. Somehow, they make magic happen.

You know what? I bet you most of these folks have “more time” than most.

Why? How?

They optimize their life to maximize their time.

Furthermore, I bet you they read more books than most too.

Imagine being one who catches the bus at 6:30 am after dropping the kids off at early-drop off and/or daycare/preschool. So what do they do with that next 10–30 minutes of commuting time (before and after work)? They probably use that next 10-30 minutes to listen to a book or podcast or watch a video tutorial that they downloaded on their phone instead of passively looking out the window or on FacebookInstagramRedditNewsetc.

They have the time & you have this same time.

Maybe you don’t commute via train, maybe you drive to work.

Same thing.

Use that time to learn, grow, etc. Maybe you work at home? That’s cool. Listen to books/podcasts while driving/walking to the grocery store or dentist/or wherever you’re driving.

For example, let’s think about the time in the shower. Could that be put to use? Hell yes, it can. Put an audio book on while you’re in the shower. That’s 10-15 minutes a day. 10-15 minutes a day for 30 days is 5 to 7.5 hours. You can easily listen to a book a month simply by listening to it in the shower. Use the Audible app to download books and listen to them on the go.

“I don’t have the time.” Yeah. Ok.

“… but I don’t have time to eat healthy and work out”

Maybe you want to work out and get yourself into better health and don’t have time for the gym. I get it. Do a bodyweight program by any number of fitness trainers 3-5 days a week at home. There a TON of them online for free. Eat salads for lunch. The best shape I got into in my life I worked out two days a week and ate healthy (salads and steamed veggies). The diet did more for me than working out did.

Maybe you don’t have a ton of time for meal prep. Ok, I get it. Then follow intermittent fasting – it helps you learn how to control your hunger and is proven to be very good for your health. Fewer meals to prepare – eating less and improving health? Yes. I’m in. Eat steamed veggies from the microwave for two meals a day with lean grilled meats. Do a meal prep day on Sunday. There are always options.

I once knew a girl in college who would cook beans and rice every Sunday and have that for lunch because she didn’t have time to make lunch every day and bring it to college. She did the work on Sundays. She found the time, owned the problem and fixed it – even on the cheap.

Finding Time is Easy

Finding time is easy if you look hard enough. It’s everywhere. 10 minutes here, 15 minutes there. Before you know it you have an hour or two each day you can use.

If you feel like you don’t have time try to find all the spaces where you’re not doing anything (dentist office waiting, doctors office waiting, at a kids drama practice, waiting) and then use that time to push the ball a little further down the field. I bring my laptop everywhere, just in case I have a free moment to crank things out. In fact, I’m writing this post at my accountant’s office this AM while he’s preparing some documents for me.

I’m not saying to give up that time you spend with your family. That has importance too. Maybe one of your goals is to be a great parent and/or spouse. Then execute on it and find the time to be a great parent. Use the spare time for that. Same for anything else that you find that you want to accomplish. It doesn’t have to be “work” or “business”. If you “don’t have time to walk the dog”, then stop surfing Facebook or Instagram while you’re on the toilet (you know you do it too).

The moral of the story is – you do have the time, it’s most likely being wasted on needless activities that provide no real growth value to you.

Tips

One thing I advise is to try to get up earlier – before anyone else. I’ll admit, it’s not easy. One thing I do the night before is write down a couple of things I want to get done before everyone else gets up (could be work out/run, get task x done, read, work on your project, etc). You get such a head start on the day that you feel positive and happy.

Can you do the same at night? Yes, for sure. Maybe you’re a night owl and get most your work/etc stuff done from 9pm-3am. That’s fine too. However, I will say this – when you’re tired, it’s much easier to simply go to bed and miss out on those hours. When you get a head start at the beginning of the day you start off on the right foot. Waiting to get some stuff done at the end of the day can sometimes fall apart (bad day, super tired, made a bad decision by having few too many at happy hour, etc).

Next, focus on whatever you want to accomplish and execute until it’s done. Don’t lose focus. Do not get distracted. Kill all external distractions. Complete the task at all costs. Striking an item off a to-do list (even if it is mental) is a huge win. Build upon these wins and snowball them.
Be obsessed with your passions and goals. Its ok to be that way. Do you want to be the best parent in the world? Go do it. Don’t let anything stop you. Do you want to be the best long-distance marathon runner? Go do it. Do you want to be the best rheumatologist in the United States? GO. DO. IT.

No one is going to give you anything. You have to get it yourself. You have to take the risks. You have to make it happen. To do those things you’ll need to find the time and trust me, you have it.

 

Make it happen.

 

 

Photo credit: @loic

Make the Most of Your Time

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Make the Most of Your Time
Photo: Uroš Jovičić

Recently, a  friend of mine asked if I wanted to partake in a small side project with him. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the time to commit to the project so I politely declined.

He responded with:

Dude I totally understand. I’m single at the moment and pretty much have my ass alone to take care of and I can barely remain afloat. You are a rockstar. I don’t know how the hell you can do it.

What he’s saying is that he has no idea how I get so much stuff done with my situation (Married, 2 kids, consulting, founding a company, a podcast, presenting, writing, 3 dogs, 3 cats, etc etc etc).

So how do I get so much stuff done?

Time optimization, 100%.

Don’t get me wrong … I’m not some zen-productivity-master, not at all. I just value my time.

The way I see it is like this:

Time is your life.

Life is Finite

One time I did an exercise that scared me: I took a look at the average life span of a US Male (~78 years) and I calculated the days I had left in my life.

Hint: It’s not that much. 😯

After seeing that number it catapulted me into action. To check yours go here: http://www.countmydays.com/

I’m not being morbid about life, it’s merely factual.

 

Seeing the Number of Days Left in Your Life is Scary

My friend replied back with a shocked face:

I calculated the waking hours I had left in my life.

Holy cow, this freaks me out … 😮

I know the feeling. Every time I look at the number, it’s smaller. 📉 It never goes up. 😢

Not many people look into how many days are left in their life. They should though – as it’s a humbling exercise. I think it’s important as it helps keep yourself grounded and keep your ambitions high because, well, your time is limited. You have less of it than you think.

There’s a popular blog post titled The Tail End in which the author draws little pictures of how many months, weeks and days he has left. He goes on further to outline how much time we have left with loved ones, time left doing things you love, face time with children, etc. Read it, it’s worth your time (pun intended).

You probably never thought about this, but around 90% of the time that you will have spent with your parents was done from the ages of 0-18. So if you have kids – remember this. My daughter just turned 9 and I realized that I’m already 45% through the average time that I will spend with her in our combined lives. That really sucks, but it also puts urgency into what matters – being with my children as much as possible and not taking it for granted.

So … Why am I harping on this so much? 

I’m doing so because your time here is finite. You only have so many at bats and then the game is over. That’s it. All done. Why not give it all you have, all the time? Why not chase those ambitions and dreams? Fix those broken relationships? Say sorry instead of being stubborn. You get what I’m saying.

The value of my time is a primary driver in my decision to work remotely. I know I only have so long with my kids, my wife, my family. Why waste that valuable resource commuting to and from work just to sit at a desk? To me, that’s absolutely insane.

Unfortunately, even though this information is quite eye opening, sometimes people will still avoid doing what they want to do due to fear.

Fear of failure.

Fear of rejection.

Fear of success (yes, it’s really a thing).

Break Down Your Fears and Do It

One of my favorite things to use to combat fear is to utilize a technique known as “Fear Setting“. I picked this up from Tim Ferriss, and you can watch a video on it here – Fear Setting by Tim Ferriss (Ted Talk). It helps you determine what you’re scared of and helps you realize it’s usually not that big of a deal. The video is very important, so please take a few minutes and watch it. Queue it up while you eat your lunch, etc. One of the quotes he uses in the talk is this one –

We suffer more often in imagination than in reality. – Seneca

This is so true. Using quotes like this and a mix of Stoicism to remind you of important things in life makes it easy to appreciate what you have, and how much time you have left and what you can do to maximize it.

Lastly, Steve Jobs has a quote that I often refer to:

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure — these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. – Steve Jobs, Stanford 2005 Commencement Speech

I’m not a huge Steve Jobs fan, but this speech really helped ground me. I have a recurring calendar event every 3 months to watch this speech. It always helps course correct me when I’m wandering in the sea of life.

Yeah, I know … you’ve heard that life is short, but seeing it in numbers is humbling and action inspiring, no doubt.

So, how do I get so much done?

I remind myself that life is finite.

 

I’d like to thank Kaushik Gopal for reviewing this article.

 

The Rule of Thirds

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Photo by Aaron Escobar via Creative CommonsPhoto by Aaron Escobar via Creative Commons

I learned one simple thing years ago that helped me more than I think anything else I’ve learned in awhile.

What is it?

You can’t make everyone happy.

 

I’ve tried. It just doesn’t work.

When you do try to make everyone happy you eventually end up feeling defeated and burned out. At the end of the day you’ve wasted part of your life on trying to please people who do not want to be pleased.

I eventually learned to accept what I call the rule of thirds. I’m not the first one to come up with this, but it is very useful so I thought I’d share it here.

The Rule of Thirds

The rule of thirds is a mental system which you can apply to your day to day life to help alleviate the mental load of worrying about making everyone happy.

The rule of thirds is as follows …
When you create something in life (a business, products, a presentation, public speaking, an idea, something at work, etc – it doesn’t matter .. its anything) people are going to react in one of three ways:

  • 1/3 of people are going to be positive about it
  • 1/3 of people are going to be indifferent about it
  • 1/3 of people are going to be negative about it

As soon as you realize that this is the way the world works, the easier things become.

Give a presentation on XYZ Topic at your local MeetUp? Most may like it, some may hate it, and some are indifferent.

You can’t make everyone happy … and that’s ok.

Thats why this world is great. We all have different opinions, emotions and things we enjoy. Everyone is unique.

So the next time someone trolls you online about something you’ve done, just realize what bucket they’re in and move on with your life. Don’t let it disrupt your day.